Life is hard for you? Why, is there anyone for whom it is not hard? And do those in the world really have no troubles? Be patient, and a comforter will come in time. The Lord said, `In your patience possess ye your souls' (Lk. 21:19). If you are unable to do something and your health does not permit it, humble yourself and beg meekly [to be excused] - and above all, be patient. And if you lose patience in some situation, reproach yourself and ask God for help.
When it is needful that a person be humbled, then not only the Superior, the sisters, strangers and near ones, but even all creation, according to the words of St. Isaac the Syrian, will rise up against that person.
He who wishes to purify his faults purifies them with tears, and he who wishes to acquire virtues, acquires them with tears; for weeping is the way the Scriptures and our Fathers give us, when they say 'Weep!' Truly, there is no other way than this.
Sometimes afflictions are sent to a person even though he is innocent, so that he would suffer for others, as did Christ. The Savior Himself first suffered for people. His Apostles also suffered for the Church and for people. Perfect love means suffering for your neighbor.
As for uprooting your passions, begin with self-reproach and with awareness of your own weaknesses; and consider yourself to be deserving of afflictions.
If Nabuzardan, the court cook of the King of the Babylonians, had not gone to Jerusalem, then the Temple would not have burned (cf. 2 Kings 24), That is to say, a person’s mind is not attacked by the flames of carnal pleasures, if a person is not conquered by gluttony.
A greedy appetite for food is terminated by satiety and the pleasure of drinking ends when our thirst is quenched. And so it is with the other things... But the possession of virtue, once it is solidly achieved, cannot be measured by time nor limited by satiety. Rather, to those who are its disciples it always appears as something ever new and fresh.
You will not perish on account of thoughts with which you do not sympathize and from which you at least try to be freed. Only repent, & humble yourself. And God will forgive you.
