He who prays with the lips, but neglects his soul and does not guard his heart, prays to the air and not to God; and he labors in vain, because God attends to the mind and fervor, and not to prolixity. One should pray with all one’s fervor, with one’s soul and mind & heart, with the fear of God, and with all one’s strength.
For while the body is bowed to the ground the mouth babbles idly, and the mind wanders here and there through the house, through the market place, how can such a person say he has prayed before the face of God? He prays before the face of the Lord who contains his soul in every direction, and withdraws it from all that is earthly, and, thrusting aside every human reflection, raises it up towards heaven.
Let us then not lose heart, nor be slothful or timid in prayer. Even if we have been brought down to the depths of evil, prayer can speedily draw us back.
While warning our children of the necessity of protecting themselves from social phenomena and habits which might attract them into the sin of our times, we beg them to look for direction in their lives and not to the evil of perverted, faithless humanity, but to that Light of the World which we have in the holy Church. The stronger the evil surrounding us, the more we must oppose to it the power of good by strengthening and developing our life in the Church and by practicing acts of love. Orthodox families must make an effort to form circles of acquaintances and friends from among the people of their own faith and culture, united around their parish church and the grace-filled life of the Church.
That prayer may be poured forth with that fervor and singleness of heart that it ought to have, these rules must always be observed. In the first place, anxiety concerning the things of the flesh must be altogether be put away; then we must not allow to enter our minds any thought or even memory of worldly cares or business. We must cut off slanderings, vain words or many words, jestings and the like. We must root out the disturbances of anger especially, and despondency, and also tear up the
evil roots of carnal lust and avarice. And so with these and similar faults done entirely away with and cut off, - things which can also be discerned by human eyes - and with such a cleansing and purifying as we have mentioned first carried out in the sincerity of simplicity and innocence, we must lay the unshakable foundations of humility strong enough to sustain a tower which shall pierce the heavens.
Ask the angels and the saints to intercede for you, just as you'd ask people who are alive. Stand face to face with them, in the belief that they are also standing face to face with you.
Pray firstly to be purified of passions, secondly to be freed from ignorance and forgetfulness, and thirdly to be delivered from all temptation and forsaking.
Be fond of working with your hands, but still more of the memory of prayer; because the first does not always bring us the fruit of that occupation, while the second does so unceasingly. Do not stop praying until you have paid your due of prayer in full, and do not listen to the thought that it is time to sit down to work. Equally, when you sit at work, do not be too concerned in it, lest you agitate the heart by your haste and make it worthless for prayer.
To pray with self-constraint is in our power, whereas to pray with compunction depends upon God. We must pray with what prayer we can, and for our self-constraint God will give us compunction also in due time, when this is pleasing to Him.
Prayer is a great good if offered up from a thankful soul; if we are steadfast in it, so that whether we receive or do not receive what we pray for we at all times give thanks to God. For since He will sometimes grant what we ask and sometimes will not, in both cases it is to our gain... For oftentimes God will delay, not as denying our prayer, but in His wisdom seeking rather for our perseverance, and desiring to draw us nearer to Himself; as a loving father when asked by his son for something will often do; withholding consent, and not from the will to refuse, but rather to encourage him in steadfastness.
The simplest means for confining the will within its proper bounds lies in disposing children to do nothing without permission. Let them be eager to run to their parents and ask: May I do this or that? They should be persuaded by their own experience and that of others that to fulfill their own desires without asking is dangerous; they should be put in such a frame of mind that they even fear their own will.
You describe how bitterly you regret the inefficacy of your prayers. Beware: to wish for consolation or revelation in prayer is a sure sign of pride. Pray humbly, in perfect simplicity, seeking salvation only through forgiveness, & having faith that God will extend to you His mercy - as He did to the publican.
Until we have acquired true prayer, we are like those who introduce children to walking. Make the effort to raise up, or rather, to enclose your mind within the words of your prayer; and if, like a child, it gets tired and falters, raise it up again. The mind, after all, is naturally unstable, but the God Who can do everything can also give it firm endurance. Persevere in this, therefore, and do not grow weary...
When you are praying alone, and your spirit is dejected, and you are wearied and oppressed by your loneliness, remember then, as always, that God the Trinity looks upon you with eyes brighter than the sun; also all the angels, your own Guardian Angel, and all the Saints of God. Truly they do; for they are all one in God, and where God is, there are they also. Where the sun is, thither also are directed all its rays. Try to understand what this means.