For this world is opposed to the world above, and this present age to the eternity above. The Christian therefore, according to Holy Scripture, must deny the world, and be translated and pass in mind out of this present age, in which the mind is placed and exposed to allurements ever since the transgression of Adam, into another age, and in frame of thought must live in the world of the Godhead above, as it is said, But our conversation is in heaven. (Phil. iii. 20.).
A person standing at an open window hears the sounds from outside; it is impossible not to do so. But he can give the voices his attention or not, as he himself wishes. The praying person is continually beset by a stream of inappropriate thoughts, feelings and mental impressions. To stop this tiresome stream is as impracticable as to stop the air from circulating in an open room. But one can notice them or not. This, say the saints, one learns only through practice.
A brother was insulted by his friend, but, desiring peace with him, went to him to be reconciled. But the other would not open the door to him and, abusing him from within, drove him away from the house. The brother complained to a spiritual elder, who said to him: 'In going to make peace with your brother, you have, all along the way, condemned him in your thoughts and justified yourself. I advise you, if your friend sins against you, to order your thoughts as though it were you who had
sinned against him, and then go to him, justifying him and condemning yourself in your thoughts.' The brother did this, and what happened? As soon as he drew near to his brother's house, the latter opened the door wide, ran to him and embraced him, and peace was made between them.
To be a righteous man among the righteous is a great and praiseworthy thing. But it is a far greater and more praiseworthy thing to be a righteous man among the unrighteous.
You describe how bitterly you regret the inefficacy of your prayers. Beware: to wish for consolation or revelation in prayer is a sure sign of pride. Pray humbly, in perfect simplicity, seeking salvation only through forgiveness, & having faith that God will extend to you His mercy - as He did to the publican.
Pray that you may be granted the grace to read the Fathers with the right understanding, the grace to live up to the standards they put before you, and the grace clearly to see your own frailty. You will not long be left wanting and waiting. God will give you help.
Do not think that even here any one of us constantly enjoys consolation. No: here, as everywhere, flesh and mind are at war; here as everywhere, there is falling into pride and purification through humbling: here, as everywhere, we long for consolations but must learn to carry a weighty cross. This cross tests our love. Can we, do we love God even under the weight of the most bitter adversities?
A thick rope is composed of thin strands of hemp. One thin strand cannot hold you bound nor strangle you, for you will easily, with the lightest touch, break it and free yourself. But if a thick rope binds you, you will stay bound, and it will strangle you. You cannot easily break it and free yourself of it. As a thick rope is made from thin, weak strands, so men's passions are made up of smaller initial sins. The small, initial sins a man can still break and free himself of. But sin on sin, repeated, the weave becomes thicker and thicker until it becomes a passion, which masters a man as only it can do. You can neither cut it out easily nor cast it away from you nor be divorced from it. Oh, when will men guard themselves from these first sins? Then they would not have so much difficulty in freeing themselves from the passions.
He who knows not the Son cannot know the Father. He who knows the Son knows the Father also. He who sees the Son sees the Father also. God cannot be known without His light, which came among men. The light of the Father is the Son. 'I am the light', said Christ. And the light shines in darkness. The physical world would be in total darkness if it were not for the light of the sun, and the spiritual and moral world, and all human life, would be in darkness if it were not for the light that is from the Father. And that light is Christ the Lord.
Exercise patience out of love for your fellow man. Exercise patience in order to benefit your soul. For if you do not take your soul into consideration, you lose your patience.
The most important thing in any good effort and the height of all activities is to persevere in prayer, by means of which we can always acquire through supplication the other virtues from God as well.
A prayer offered while one has any cause to reproach a fellow man is an impure prayer. There is only one whom the praying person may and must reproach, and that is himself. Without self-reproach, your prayer is as worthless as it is while you are reproaching someone else in your heart. Perhaps you ask: How can one learn this? The answer is: One learns it through prayer.
Let us be sure, then, that God will not give spiritual gifts - the gifts of understanding, of faith, of love, of purity, of prophecy, of working wonders, of power over demons, of insight, of sight of the heavenly world, to him who has gambled with and made evil use, like the Prodigal Son, of the gifts of bodily health, honor, wealth, success among men or knowledge of this material world, or some other skill or capacity.
