The joint prayer of husband and wife is a great force. That may be one of the reasons why the enemy is trying to get both of you to break this excellent habit. [This is] one more temptation which God permits so that you should learn to overcome it and come out of the testing stronger than before!
A certain brother asked the Abbot Poemen, saying, 'What am I to do, Father, for I am troubled in sadness?' The old man said to him, 'Look to no man for aught, condemn no man, disparage no man: and God shall give thee rest.'
Dearly beloved, had marriage or the raising of children been likely to prove a stumbling block on the way to virtue, the Creator of all would not have introduced marriage into our life lest it prove our undoing in difficult times and through severe problems. Since, however, family life not only offers us no obstacle to wisdom in God's eyes as long as we are prepared to be on our guard, but even brings us much encouragement and calms the tumult of our natural tendencies, not allowing the billows to surge but constantly ensuring that the ship dock safely in the harbor, consequently He granted the human race the consolation that comes from this source...
A certain brother asked the Abbot Poemen, saying, 'What am I to do, Father, for I am troubled in sadness?' The old man said to him, 'Look to no man for aught, condemn no man, disparage no man: and God shall give thee rest.'
Demons often transform themselves into angels of light and take the form of martyrs, and make it appear to us during sleep that we are in communication with them. Then, when we wake up, they plunge us into unholy joy and conceit. But you can detect their deceit by this very fact. For angels reveal torments, judgments and separations; and when we wake up we find that we are trembling and sad. As soon as we begin to believe the demons in dreams, then they make sport of us when we are awake too. He who believes in dreams is completely inexperienced. 'But he who distrusts all dreams is a wise man. Only believe dreams that warn you of torments and judgments. But if despair afflicts you, then such dreams are also from demons.
Husbands, never call her simply by her name, but with terms of endearment, with honor, with much love. Honor her, and she will not need honor from others; she will not want the glory that comes from others, if she enjoys that which comes from thee. Prefer her before all, on every account, both for her beauty and her discernment, and praise her.
Ponder the truth of Christian marriage: man and wife are one flesh! Does it not follow that they must share all their possessions? And yet you two haggle over this property! And why? Because of words!
The husband and wife must lay virtue, and not passion, as the foundation of their love, that is, when the husband sees any fault in his wife, he must nudge her meekly, and the wife must submit to her husband in this. Likewise when a wife sees some fault in her husband, she must exhort him, and he is obliged to hear her. In this manner their love will be faithful and unbroken, and thereby having mutually composed their happiness, they shall take pleasure in the virtue.
Some people living carelessly in the world have asked me: 'We have wives and are beset with social cares, and how can we lead the solitary life?' I replied to them: 'Do all the good you can; do not speak evil of anyone; do not steal from anyone; do not hate anyone; do not be absent from Divine services; do not offend anyone; do not wreck another man's domestic happiness, and be content with what your own wives can give you. If you behave in this way, you will not be far from the Kingdom of Heaven.'
No one can say, 'I am poor and hence I have no means of giving alms.' For even if you cannot give as the rich gave their gifts into the temple treasury, give two farthings as the poor widow did, and from you God will consider it greater gift than the gifts of the rich. And if you do not have as much as two farthings? You can take pity on the sick and give alms by ministering to them. And if you cannot do even this? You can comfort your brother by your words. 'A good word is better than the best of gifts.'
Comprising one flesh, [the couple] also has a single soul, and their mutual love awakens in them a zeal for piety. For the state of wedlock does not estrange us from God, but rather ties us more closely to Him, for it brings forth a greater impetus to turn to Him. Even under a light breeze, a small boat moves forward…., a light breeze will not move a great ship.... Thus, those not burdened with secular concerns have less need of help from Almighty God, but one who has responsibilities, who looks after his beloved spouse, his estate and his children, traverses a broader sea of life, and has greater need of God’s help. In return [for that help], he himself comes to love God even more.
The husband must bear in mind that his deeds and words should engender piety in his home. The wife must look after the house. However, in addition to that occupation, she must also attend to another, more pressing concern - that the whole family strive [to attain] the Heavenly Kingdom.
It is essential to summon the priests to confirm with prayers and blessings the couple in their life together, so that the groom’s love might intensify, the bride’s chastity of mind be strengthened, everything work to ensure that the virtues settle into their home, the machinations of the devil be scattered, and that the couple, united through God’s help, might spend their life in joy.
When someone is free, he has rights and obligations. When he gets married, he has few rights and very many obligations. When, however, he obtains children also, he has no rights, but only obligations.
Marriage is the representation of an important reality. It is a representation of Jesus Christ and the Church. It is a mystery, and the mystery consists of this, the fact that the spouses are united and the two become one. In great silence, while all around them there is complete tranquility, the two are united and together form the image of God. One meets the other to make one body.
